So one of the most popular questions we get asked is whether or not my FW is going to take my name. I never realized how important this subject was to people. It's like the future of humanity will be determined by the last name that my FW goes by. I think it was Romeo who said, "What's in a name?" (Yes, I just quoted Shakespeare in a blog post). I just don't see what the big deal is. Maybe you guys could explain it to me.
Well, I didn't really want to bring up the subject much while we were just dating because of my FW's ban on marriage talk. When I would tell people (especially my family) that my girlfriend was a feminist, they would immediately ask about the name change. Since we hadn't been dating long, this confirmed to me that my family is basically nuts. I used to just tell them that I didn't really know, but I thought she might keep her last name (at least professionally) which was fine with me. Here's the thing though. There is something special about sharing a last name. I guess in some ways it is symbolic of spiritual unity. As progressive and boundary breaking as we are, we decided to go ahead and try for the same last name (except professionally - deal with it).
This gave us a few options. One, we could hyphenate our last names, but this an article we read by a feminist who had done so convinced us otherwise. I mean, what would our grandchildren's last names be (assuming they too marry the children of a couple as gender-conscious as us)? Two, we could combine our last name into a new one, and while Kerrly has a nice ring to it... actually, no it doesn't. Three, we could just abandon our last names and choose a brand new one, our favorite was Katsopolis (like Uncle Jesse on Full House). Don't laugh, that is still in the running.
I think we decided to go with option four. My FW will use her last name as a second middle name while taking my last name. I will also add her last name as a second middle name (assuming that is possible in the state of Texas), and our kids will all have it as a second middle name. We think it will really start to catch on and soon oppressive patriarchal systems all over the world will crumble.
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4 comments:
You forgot the option where we abandon all last names and we each go by only our first names. C'mon, aren't we trying to break the system? ;)
Interesting...
I vote for both changing your names to spouse (ha ha ha ha)
Knowing the affinity you both share for the game of Scrabble, I came up with an interesting way of chosing a new last name. I randomly selected seven tiles and came up with the following: AQ'dadeo. Of course, the first A must remain silent. That leaves us with Q - dad - e - o. I love the beatnik ring it has. If you decide to pass on that idea may I suggest adopting your mother's maiden name. It is a quaranteed conversation starter.
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