So apparently a lot of brides go to great lengths to reach their "wedding weight," but I don't understand why they should have all of the fun. Since people tend to make New Year's Resolutions, mine is to reach my wedding weight. I won't tell you what weight that is or how much I have to lose to reach it though.
In fact, I love telling people that I am trying to lose weight even though I am not doing anything remotely close to it. It just sounds like a good thing to be doing, so even if I don't lose a pound, it is kind of fun to tell people that I am trying to make my wedding weight. It sounds like I am goal-driven and self-disciplined.
One thing that may actually help me to reach my goal is the bike I got for Christmas. My neighborhood is perfect for biking, and now my FW and I can bike everywhere. The bad part about this is that she is in much better shape than me, so I have had a hard time keeping up over the last week. In fact, after our first ride together, I almost passed out. I know it sounds really pathetic. I could list several excuses for why this happened, but it wouldn't really save me any embarrassment. Let's just say I'm not Lance Armstrong (of course, our ride wasn't exactly the Tour de France either, but there was a part where I had to go up a one inch slope).
Monday, December 31, 2007
Sunday, December 23, 2007
How to Holiday, Part III
(From the B2B)
As you have probably figured out, I'm a bit of a holiday junkie. I love all the cheesy activities that surround Christmas and the magic that surrounds the season. My FH is also a lover of Christmas and all holidays.
So we're glad we've had one holiday season engaged, because it's rather complicated when you have two families involved. We're spending Christmas with our respective families (our last one apart!). But the time we've spent with family has brought up several questions, namely how we honor each family while honoring each other and the two of us as a unit.
We've been lucky in that we've both felt it easy to become a part of each other's family, and we really truly like our in-laws. But I get homesick on normal days, so I anticipate really missing my family next Christmas. And it's made me think about all the traditions we cling to and why... I freak out if the jello salad is not in the same dish every year. In the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter at all.
So it's been cool to talk with my FH about starting new traditions and making them memorable, while absorbing what family traditions we can. Our new tradition will include minimal cooking, we at least know that for sure.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
How to Holiday (Part 2)
So my FW loves cheesy Christmas movies. She records every made for TV Christmas movie that comes on from Thanksgiving on. These movies are completely predictable, but that is part of their charm I guess.
Over the last few weeks, I have learned the basic plot lines of every successful cheesy Christmas movie. There is usually a love story that puts even the cheesiest romantic comedies to shame (for example, in the last one we watched, a thief falls in love with a cop- holiday hijinks ensue). There is often some sort of magical element because Christmas is a magical time of year (for example, in another one my FW recorded, a girl gets transported into a snow globe and falls in love- holiday hijinks ensue). Almost always someone who hates Christmas learns to love it (aka the Grinch plot). There is often a cute kid who wishes for something impossible or asks Santa for something immaterial (here is where the department store Santa tries to talk some sense into the kid without realizing that of course the real Santa has magic powers and the spirit of Christmas will in fact grant the kid his or her wish).
I must admit that I too am a sucker for these movies. I sat through one the other day where a kid asks for a new dad for Christmas- holiday dating hijinks ensue. On a related note, my FW introduced me to one of her favorite Christmas classics- Christmas in Connecticut. We also got to see the musical version of A Wonderful Life (my favorite Christmas movie) last week. It's amazing how much holiday entertainment there is out there.
Over the last few weeks, I have learned the basic plot lines of every successful cheesy Christmas movie. There is usually a love story that puts even the cheesiest romantic comedies to shame (for example, in the last one we watched, a thief falls in love with a cop- holiday hijinks ensue). There is often some sort of magical element because Christmas is a magical time of year (for example, in another one my FW recorded, a girl gets transported into a snow globe and falls in love- holiday hijinks ensue). Almost always someone who hates Christmas learns to love it (aka the Grinch plot). There is often a cute kid who wishes for something impossible or asks Santa for something immaterial (here is where the department store Santa tries to talk some sense into the kid without realizing that of course the real Santa has magic powers and the spirit of Christmas will in fact grant the kid his or her wish).
I must admit that I too am a sucker for these movies. I sat through one the other day where a kid asks for a new dad for Christmas- holiday dating hijinks ensue. On a related note, my FW introduced me to one of her favorite Christmas classics- Christmas in Connecticut. We also got to see the musical version of A Wonderful Life (my favorite Christmas movie) last week. It's amazing how much holiday entertainment there is out there.
Monday, December 17, 2007
How to Deal with Kids
So once most people turn about 13, the pressure is on. First, there is pressure to date. Then around 18 or so, the pressure turns up a notch to marriage. After that comes the pressure to have kids. Before my B2B and I were even engaged, people were asking us about marriage and grandchildren. My mom has wanted GC since her kids moved out. The issue came up a few times this weekend.
My B2B and I were visiting her family. I got to meet some friends of hers that have two boys. It was really fun. The kids were great. It made the whole parenting thing look fun. I have always loved kids, so I definitely want some of my own one day. We got home, and we told my FILs that we would be staying in Houston for the first two years of our marriage. They were really excited. Then my FMIL said after two years we could have a kid, and then we wouldn't want to leave. She must have been talking to my mom.
All this talk about kids had a nice bookend last night. My FW and I volunteer with the kids at our church once a month. She calls it free birth control. The kids are fun, but I am usually exhausted after about five minutes. I thought training a dog was difficult. My dog is pretty obedient at one and a half years. She is potty trained. She obeys commands (usually). Why does it take humans so much longer even though we are (supposedly) more intelligent? The point of all this is that kids are great when they belong to someone else. I love other people's kids. I don't think I am ready for my own though, so you can keep pressuring us about it, but that's the beauty of children's church. It undoes all the crazy ideas you guys put in our heads.
My B2B and I were visiting her family. I got to meet some friends of hers that have two boys. It was really fun. The kids were great. It made the whole parenting thing look fun. I have always loved kids, so I definitely want some of my own one day. We got home, and we told my FILs that we would be staying in Houston for the first two years of our marriage. They were really excited. Then my FMIL said after two years we could have a kid, and then we wouldn't want to leave. She must have been talking to my mom.
All this talk about kids had a nice bookend last night. My FW and I volunteer with the kids at our church once a month. She calls it free birth control. The kids are fun, but I am usually exhausted after about five minutes. I thought training a dog was difficult. My dog is pretty obedient at one and a half years. She is potty trained. She obeys commands (usually). Why does it take humans so much longer even though we are (supposedly) more intelligent? The point of all this is that kids are great when they belong to someone else. I love other people's kids. I don't think I am ready for my own though, so you can keep pressuring us about it, but that's the beauty of children's church. It undoes all the crazy ideas you guys put in our heads.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
How to Holiday (Part 1)
So with the holidays upon us, I thought I might bring up some of the traditions we are trying to incorporate. We both really love the holidays, so this will just be one of a few posts about this subject.
One of the things that I have learned recently about my B2B is that she loves Christmas trees-- ridiculously large Christmas trees. Two weeks ago, we helped set up the tree at her parents' house. It was the biggest tree I have ever seen someone put in their living room, and it was almost as wide as it was tall. I couldn't tell which end was up when I saw it on the porch. Well, my B2B, FMIL, and I spent a good hour (at least it felt like that) hacking away at the base with a saw trying to get the trunk to fit in the tree stand. When my FFIL got there, he brought out a chisel to help, and the two of us spent at least another 30 minutes trying to chip away at the bottom of the trunk. Finally, we got it to fit, and we lugged the monstrosity into the house. About a week later, my B2B and her roommate bought a 9 foot tall tree for their 8 foot apartment. Instead of cutting it, they just let the top bend over and hung an angel from it with some string. Whoville called-- they want their tree back. Then on Friday, we went with some friends to the Bayou Bend Christmas open house. They had a tree with 2000 ornaments. I think my B2B was secretly taking notes.
I forgot to mention the lights display. My B2B and her roommate set up a bunch of lights outside their apartment. It looks like the Griswold family Christmas out there. I love that my B2B has so much Christmas spirit. It fits right in with my family who still wake up somewhere around 5AM to open presents even though all of us are over 20. Christmas traditions don't need to make sense-- that makes them even better.
One of the things that I have learned recently about my B2B is that she loves Christmas trees-- ridiculously large Christmas trees. Two weeks ago, we helped set up the tree at her parents' house. It was the biggest tree I have ever seen someone put in their living room, and it was almost as wide as it was tall. I couldn't tell which end was up when I saw it on the porch. Well, my B2B, FMIL, and I spent a good hour (at least it felt like that) hacking away at the base with a saw trying to get the trunk to fit in the tree stand. When my FFIL got there, he brought out a chisel to help, and the two of us spent at least another 30 minutes trying to chip away at the bottom of the trunk. Finally, we got it to fit, and we lugged the monstrosity into the house. About a week later, my B2B and her roommate bought a 9 foot tall tree for their 8 foot apartment. Instead of cutting it, they just let the top bend over and hung an angel from it with some string. Whoville called-- they want their tree back. Then on Friday, we went with some friends to the Bayou Bend Christmas open house. They had a tree with 2000 ornaments. I think my B2B was secretly taking notes.
I forgot to mention the lights display. My B2B and her roommate set up a bunch of lights outside their apartment. It looks like the Griswold family Christmas out there. I love that my B2B has so much Christmas spirit. It fits right in with my family who still wake up somewhere around 5AM to open presents even though all of us are over 20. Christmas traditions don't need to make sense-- that makes them even better.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
How to Love People More than Ideas
So even though most of my posts consist of strings of bad jokes and rants about gender stereotypes, I decided to take a different direction today. This post is going to be a lot more serious than normal and probably a lot longer, but I think it is important here to say what is on my heart. We will return to your regularly scheduled programming later.
I am not going to pretend like my relationship with God is particularly close or that I have all the answers. Quite honestly, my relationship with God is mostly me walking blindly through life with occasional moments of clarity and peace interspersed in plenty of frustration and anger and hurt. I have plenty of issues with Christianity in case that wasn't totally obvious from everything I have been saying on this blog. However, God has been speaking to me this week, and when God speaks, it is pretty hard to miss-- mostly because He repeats things a lot just to make sure I got the point.
Last week, I watched this brilliant movie, Children of Men. One of the major themes is what happens in a world where people lose all hope, where they are completely disconnected from each other and can only cling to ideas. It isn't pretty. The movie made me think a lot about how often I put ideas above people. As I was thinking about all this, the people in my life really came through for me in amazing ways. I have felt so loved this last week. Thank you all for that. My FW and I were talking about all this on our date night this week, and it was interesting to see that we were both in similar places on this issue (as we usually are because we were made for each other). When we went to see our premarital counselor on Tuesday, he really confirmed all of this. He constantly emphasizes that love is the most important part of life, more important than beliefs and ideologies. Jesus was about love. The people he criticized were the ones who thought they had life figured out. This morning a final confirmation of this message came when I realized that a friend had been hurt by all the ideologies that I and others throw around so freely without taking the time to make sure people are loved.
As I think about it, I realize that many people have probably been hurt by my beliefs. I try not to be offensive with what I believe, but some of it comes across very strongly. I just want to clarify that the things I believe in are all about loving and valuing people for who they are. That is what Christianity is about. That is what feminism is about. That is why I sometimes get so strident about these issues. The real issue that I sometimes lose sight of is that people are more important than ideologies. Fortunately, I have God and wonderful people in my life that can keep reminding me of this.
With all that being said, I want to say that I am really sorry if what I say on this blog or in real life makes people feel attacked or defensive or hurt. That's not what this is about. I sometimes attack ideas without thinking about how it might hurt people who value those ideas. So even if you think my ideas about last names are stupid, I still love you, and you are still invited to the wedding, and I still want you in my life. I value you and your opinions (even if I disagree with them).
I am not going to pretend like my relationship with God is particularly close or that I have all the answers. Quite honestly, my relationship with God is mostly me walking blindly through life with occasional moments of clarity and peace interspersed in plenty of frustration and anger and hurt. I have plenty of issues with Christianity in case that wasn't totally obvious from everything I have been saying on this blog. However, God has been speaking to me this week, and when God speaks, it is pretty hard to miss-- mostly because He repeats things a lot just to make sure I got the point.
Last week, I watched this brilliant movie, Children of Men. One of the major themes is what happens in a world where people lose all hope, where they are completely disconnected from each other and can only cling to ideas. It isn't pretty. The movie made me think a lot about how often I put ideas above people. As I was thinking about all this, the people in my life really came through for me in amazing ways. I have felt so loved this last week. Thank you all for that. My FW and I were talking about all this on our date night this week, and it was interesting to see that we were both in similar places on this issue (as we usually are because we were made for each other). When we went to see our premarital counselor on Tuesday, he really confirmed all of this. He constantly emphasizes that love is the most important part of life, more important than beliefs and ideologies. Jesus was about love. The people he criticized were the ones who thought they had life figured out. This morning a final confirmation of this message came when I realized that a friend had been hurt by all the ideologies that I and others throw around so freely without taking the time to make sure people are loved.
As I think about it, I realize that many people have probably been hurt by my beliefs. I try not to be offensive with what I believe, but some of it comes across very strongly. I just want to clarify that the things I believe in are all about loving and valuing people for who they are. That is what Christianity is about. That is what feminism is about. That is why I sometimes get so strident about these issues. The real issue that I sometimes lose sight of is that people are more important than ideologies. Fortunately, I have God and wonderful people in my life that can keep reminding me of this.
With all that being said, I want to say that I am really sorry if what I say on this blog or in real life makes people feel attacked or defensive or hurt. That's not what this is about. I sometimes attack ideas without thinking about how it might hurt people who value those ideas. So even if you think my ideas about last names are stupid, I still love you, and you are still invited to the wedding, and I still want you in my life. I value you and your opinions (even if I disagree with them).
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
How to Celebrate
So I really want to thank everyone who made it out to the engagement party on Saturday. We were overwhelmed at the number of people that have shown their love and support. People drove in from Austin and Dallas, but even the people from Houston had to drive a good thirty minutes at least. Our hosts are glad that nothing was broken in a drunken rage, so kudos to everyone for that.
I have realized over the last couple of months how important friends and family are to the whole marriage thing. Your encouragement and advice (even if we don't follow it) have meant so much to us. We feel very blessed to have so many genuine supporters. It was a little overwhelming to see so many of you in one place this weekend. I didn't even get to talk to some of you guys.
For those of you who were there, you can see that one of our problems now is how to find a place to accommodate so many people because we are expecting quite a few for the wedding. We thought we had worked all of that out, but we ran into a bit of a problem with the wedding venue. We will keep you updated as we try to work that out. In my opinion, it is a great problem to have because it means we are getting a lot of love. So here's to all of you who make this process even more amazing.
I have realized over the last couple of months how important friends and family are to the whole marriage thing. Your encouragement and advice (even if we don't follow it) have meant so much to us. We feel very blessed to have so many genuine supporters. It was a little overwhelming to see so many of you in one place this weekend. I didn't even get to talk to some of you guys.
For those of you who were there, you can see that one of our problems now is how to find a place to accommodate so many people because we are expecting quite a few for the wedding. We thought we had worked all of that out, but we ran into a bit of a problem with the wedding venue. We will keep you updated as we try to work that out. In my opinion, it is a great problem to have because it means we are getting a lot of love. So here's to all of you who make this process even more amazing.
Monday, December 3, 2007
How to Plan a Honeymoon
So honeymoons have been a part of wedding celebrations since the 1500's, and it is certainly something I am looking forward to. Trying to find the right spot can be a bit of a challenge. There are so many choices.
We set a couple of ground rules before we started looking for potential places. First, we wanted to stay within the United States. Mainly, we didn't want the stress of overseas travel, combined with an increased chance of getting sick. Second, we decided that we couldn't go anywhere touristy. We wanted to be able to spend the entire week without the pressure of sightseeing. This was another reason to stay in the U.S. because if we had gone to another country, we would have wanted to experience the culture and see the sights. Third, we wanted beaches because we both like them. Fourth, we wanted a place that wasn't going to be packed with people.
We ended up choosing a place that is a little bit off the beaten path, called Jekyll Island. You probably haven't even heard of it, which is one of the reasons we like it. It isn't overdone, and you all know how we like going against the grain. It has beaches, and it isn't overdeveloped. Most importantly, the room we booked is awesome. We don't really plan on leaving it much. I am now laughing as I picture the face you just made.
We set a couple of ground rules before we started looking for potential places. First, we wanted to stay within the United States. Mainly, we didn't want the stress of overseas travel, combined with an increased chance of getting sick. Second, we decided that we couldn't go anywhere touristy. We wanted to be able to spend the entire week without the pressure of sightseeing. This was another reason to stay in the U.S. because if we had gone to another country, we would have wanted to experience the culture and see the sights. Third, we wanted beaches because we both like them. Fourth, we wanted a place that wasn't going to be packed with people.
We ended up choosing a place that is a little bit off the beaten path, called Jekyll Island. You probably haven't even heard of it, which is one of the reasons we like it. It isn't overdone, and you all know how we like going against the grain. It has beaches, and it isn't overdeveloped. Most importantly, the room we booked is awesome. We don't really plan on leaving it much. I am now laughing as I picture the face you just made.
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